After a chat with a dear friend, she suggested I write a book entitled "Now I get it...things you know post-marriage." It would be such a great book title! This came up after we had a conversation about boys (of course) and my perspective on how she should handle different situations. Now, my opinion on the subject matter did not form because I "aced" the dating scene but the absolute contrary! I was horrible at dating. To begin with I'm terrible at small talk. This explains why at parties I eagerly search the room to find someone I know and can have a meaningful conversation with. This is also why those "fun new relationship jitters" were not fun at all to me but torture! I like to know how someone will react to a situation before it happens. A new relationship does not lend itself to this.
I found often as a single girl that I had this crazy fear of being single FOREVER! Wow that word sounded like a long time! I just knew I would be "Aunt Jess" the one who never got married or had kids. That fear is something I have seen in my friends too. They, like me, have resolved to put up with a whole lot to avoid this fate. Now, if I could talk to myself back in the junior high, high school or even post college days I would say "why are you wasting your time on something that is not even ok much less fabulous?!" But at the time it makes sense.
Now sitting on the couch by my husband, I can't help but think I would love to relive a few of those times again. I would love to stand up for myself or tell someone "I'm just not loving our relationship/friendship/whatever" and just walk away in the security that someone worth it is waiting out there.
So here is a little question for you to ponder...If you could do the dating scene again, what changes would you make? And are these changes you can apply other places in your life? Did you ever wish you had walked away from a bad relationship? Is there a bad friendship or work relationship now that would be most beneficial if you walked away now? Food for thought...
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That's a good one. I have to say that a life lived without regret is a life not lived. Wow, did I date some losers. And maybe part of it was from fear of becoming the crazy old lady on the hill with all the dogs. But at the same time, looking back on all those mistakes makes me really appreciate my Mike. In the process I have also learned a lot about life and love and everything in between.
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